Ash Wednesday, Bitches!

Is that wrong?  If it is, I don't want to be right!

I shouldn't laugh but that was the first thing I thought of this morning upon waking...well the first thing after, wow - I've really been beaten up by life lately.  Life and a few choice people - you can suck it!

*deep breath*

Enough negativity!  It's Lent, people!  It's a time to prepare for and reflect on the coming Easter season and what it means.  Lots of people give up things for Lent - meat, sugar, soda, porn, whatever.  I've never been much for that.  Anything I could think of to give up always seemed self-servingm a la "Oh, I'll give up chocolate and both be disciplined AND lose weight/eat better."  This year I'm taking a page out of my husband's book and adding things on and letting things go rather than just giving something up for 40 days. 

Devotional #1: Regular Evening Prayers with Craig
Craig has several nifty books not unlike the Book of Common Prayer and we are going to take this Lenten time to really try and focus some choice evening minutes toward prayer and reflection.  There is a lot going on in our lives that has created a perfect storm of anger and despair.  It has all made it very difficult to talk to God because we've spent a lot of time mad at Him lately.  This is a step in the direction of letting go of that anger and developing more regular times to turn inward and outward in healthy ways.

Devotional #2: Reading through Lamentations
I told Craig this morning that I thought I should consider reading through a chapter of the bible this Lenten season.  "A chapter?"  He sounded confused.  I realized my mistake.  "A book!  A chapter wouldn't really take all 40 day - haha."  I wasn't sure which book to pick (my bible knowledge is rather shamefully slim) and Craig suggested Lamentations.  I asked whether he was suggesting it given our recent struggles or because of Lent and he said both.  I figured, hey, what the heck!  I'm going to spend this time reading through this book, of which I am wholey unfamiliar, and mulling over my experience with it.  Craig's also going to be reading through it as well so that we can discuss any questions either of us have though let's be honest and just admit it'll be me with the questions.

On top of these two new project/tasks, I am also going to work through my feelings of anger, abandonment, and envy and try to be a more positive and forgiving person.  I think that's going to take a lot longer than 40 days but I think it might do me good to focus on this little piece of personal betterment during a season of self-reflection moving toward the cross. (Man, do I sound like I'm married to a seminarian or what?  LOL)

Anyhoo - I'm going to try and use this space as a regular reflection space for my journey so look for most posts on this subject to follow (all you two readers of my blog)!