Long Legs Big Belly

Apparently in the maternity world, you can either be fat or tall. I can't be too upset because I recognize that were I not on the larger end of the scale, I probably wouldn't be having this problem but it's still frustrating. I say probably because pants with the right inseam has been a life-long quest for me, through both the lean and the fat years.

Regular pants with inseams at 32" are *justbarely* right so long as, in the words of a friend, they don't even look at a dryer. I prefer a 34" because I can wear wedges or flats and both look okay. Pre-pregnancy it was hard enough to find longer lengths on pants. Lane Bryant has stuff but their store can be frustrating. My problems below:

• First is the cost - ouch! This just leads me to try other stores and gnash my teeth in agony over their lack of pant length (Target, I'm looking at you) or their lack of an actual bricks-and-mortar plus size section, forcing me instead to contemplate the clothes presented in the ephemera of the Internet and wonder what they will fit like because Lord know that people, especially those of the lumpier persuasion, love to buy their clothes without make sure they don't bulge, pull, or slide off first (Old Navy/Gap/etc, I'm looking at you).
• Second - vanity sizing. For the love of pete (Love of Pete? love of Pete?...not sure of the capitalization there), I shop in that store because I'm not as skinny as I once was. I don't need a pant saying I'm a size 4 to make me feel better! I was never a size 4 to begin with. It just makes finding the right jeans/pants a pain in the ass!
• Third is waist level - the lowest of the low waists are still really kind of high. I don't want pants so low that they make people think I'm a plumber as a second job but I would like to be able to wear pants that don't come up to my armpits. Okay, I'm exaggerating a little but I would like something a tad lower than above/at the belly button. I'm fairly certain I'm not the shortest-torsoed person to shop there so I'm curious as to how others handle it. Although, on second though, I also don't have the booty that I see sometimes there so maybe that lowers the waistband for you? Hmm...
• Fourth is length - ironically, their "longs" are often WAY too long. I'm not too upset about third because I have seen some really, REALLY tall women in that store and if I have a hard time at 5'9"/5'10" on a good day finding pants, I can't imagine how women well over 6' do it. Cost at LB is what mostly keeps me away, though since they started vanity sizing stuff I find the trips so ridiculously irritating for common sense and for practicality that I've stopped going.

This long rant about LB is a bit off-topic but it's all tied in to my Sisyphus-esque struggle toward the perfect pair of pants. I'm sure I could have picked a better tragic reference but it's early and I haven't had substantial caffeine since June. :)

Anyway, what this all leads into is that prior to my swelling belly and my Bean, if I wanted to spend the big bucks and the time sorting through a rather confusing chart of sizing, I could find a pair of jeans/pants long enough to suit me. I might even get lucky, as I did once, with a pair of $10 pants from Wal-Mart of all places, that for the most part are teh awesome. However, that ability has apparently disappeared only slightly more quickly than I fear my feet will.

I bought my first maternity clothes yesterday. It was both nifty and terrifying. It has been very hard for me to justify spending money, any kind of money, on clothing I know with absolute certainty I won't be wearing next fall and I hopefully won't be wearing ever again. (I've already informed Craig that once the baby comes, I'll be taking full advantage of this new-fangled metabolism I seem to have and will be dropping this weight. I have two weddings next fall and while I doubt I'll be "smokin'", I'm sure I'll be able to muster up a jaw drop or two. I also informed him that should we be blessed with any more kids, I want to be able to shop in the normal, and thus bigger, sections. He laughed and said he was with me all the way.) So with the cost vs. the relative term of use in mind, I didn't really want to spend a fortune.

I had looked at JC Penney's store and online in hopes of finding some good pants. The benefit of current trends is that there are a lot of loose tops with folds and pleating that mean I can wear most of my sweaters, shirts, and dresses until fairly late in the game. It's the pants that are the problem. I haven't completely popped yet but even with my Bella band, my jeans and work pants are becoming uncomfortable. I needed something for work and play. JC Penney has a great collection of stuff online but in stores, not so much. Additionally, online you can pick from an array of body types but never do "plus size" and "tall" meet. Le sigh. I found a couple cute things but was really, REALLY leery of buying pants online without having tried them on. I then went to Motherhood's online store and found some cute stuff, again leery of buying online.

So for a week I hemmed and hawed and decided to just screw it and not get anything. That stuck for a whole five days. Yesterday, I was out running some errands out at the infamously trafficky Harbison mall and it dawned on me that Motherhood's actual store might have something. I had been in once to look for a dress but as the store itself was kind of small and the Plus size section was maybe two racks of stuff, I had had no luck and thus had written it off. I figured I'd go give them another shot.

The store was still tiny, and the selection for me still small but they did have pants and THANK GOODNESS I tried them on. I assumed I was bigger than I was and all that pants were falling off. hehe I found a pair of black twill pants and a pair of jeans. Both are *justbarelyok* length-wise but it's really the best that I can do. The girl in the store said they had longs in the regulars and the biggest regulars were stretch so that might work but really, who wants to see that? I don't. :) I don't plan on buying loads of preggo clothes and the next go-round I won't have this problem so I'm not too worried about it in the long run but man is it frustrating in the short-run!

I am now the proud owner of two pairs of maternity pants. Weird and pretty cool. It means my body's doing what it is supposed to which means the Bean is doing what it is supposed to. I had a spring in my step leaving the store with a bag that announced to every nosey person in the mall who reads other people's bags, "Nope, I am NOT chowing down on donuts at an alarming rate. No, that's not a beer gut. I'm pregnant!"